Some say that we’re in the process of becoming what we already are which is perfect creations of a perfect creator. Others say we’re on the road to perdition. Still others say that everyone that’s not us is out to get us, while others say nothing and shine like the sun. There are obviously many other perspectives, always have been and always will be. The question that’s most salient in the moment is: What’s at risk for you? In your day to day life what do you have to risk to be alive and fully express who you truly are? What’s at risk 4 U 2 B U?
Do you know who you really are, where you’ve come from, where you’re going and why you’re here beyond the physical realities? How connected to your Inner Being are you? How aware are you of the Great Creator that’s beyond time and space and yet here, there and everywhere energizing life with grace? And if you have a sense of who you are, how willing are you to risk your present identity for a more expansive future than the one you’re presently living? How often do you act for your highest good as well as that of others. How are you caring for you?
I was reading from The Book of Awakening by Mark Nepo the other day where he said: “Honoring ourselves is the only lasting way to release a truly selfless kindness to others.” All we need to be kind to ourselves and others, he went on to say, is an open heart. What’s at risk here is revealing our inauthentic and habitual patterns of holding back. Reflecting on my boyhood I see where I learned not to risk showing my naive, innocent, sensitive self. I see where the experience of being silenced, judged and misunderstood created walls within.
Can you remember times in your life where you risked being your unique creative self and got labeled as crazy, high strung, stupid, naive, foolish, too quiet or talkative, airy fairy, butch, girlie, pushy or a thousand other put downs that you internalized and vowed never to risk showing again? Where did these wonderful parts go? How long have you hidden, repressed and denied these unique self-expressive parts of yourself? How many opportunities have you resisted, hidden from and repressed to play safe? What’s at risk to bring new life to these creative parts?
I remember back in the late fifties learning how to play the electric guitar. I used to sing and play along in the privacy of my bedroom with Elvis, the Everly Brothers, Ricky Nelson, Buddy Holly and others. I couldn’t play in public because of my programmed insecurities but I kept playing for myself because I loved making music. Twenty years later I was sitting on the floor of a farmhouse in Kentucky singing and playing my own music when I noticed man who was remodeling the house casually yet intently listening to the concert I was performing for myself.
When I finished the song he came into the room, took my guitar from me, put it in the case, extended his hand, lifted me off the floor and told me to get in his truck. I balked and questioned his motives. With enthusiasm he told me that a former high school best friend was a music producer in Nashville who owned a studio. He’d told ‘Ray‘ to bring him some great talent whenever he found it. “You’ve got it brother so let’s go to Nashville right now. It’s only a couple hour drive. My crew can finish the work here and your brother-in-law won’t mind.” I said NO!
Twenty five years later I went into a studio in Colorado to create my first professional album of original music with some of the best musicians in the state at my own expense. I played only one concert and continued to hide that light under my basket. What was at risk for me? It was the risk of owning my artist self and all of what comes with stepping out of invisibility onto the stage of vulnerability. It was the risk of losing what I already had and the risk of sailing off into the mystery of the unknown. . . . What have you said no to that could have changed your life?
None of us can go back to what could have been. We however can go forward to what can be when we finally welcome the abandoned parts of ourselves and our dreams. We can reclaim our lost selves, reimagine and realign with our true natures. We can re-discover the inner world and treat it as a ‘cathedral of consciousness.’ So, whether we play our music in Carnegie Hall or in the privacy of our living room we can enter into the joy of creation. Whether we create a best selling book or author a life that stirs our own souls, it’s embracing the Essence of who we are.
Taking the risk to be alive and expressing who you really are as a co-creator is the challenge and gift of a lifetime. Rather than settling for what someone said you should be or live in what could have been, you can awaken and step into your gold, your radiant magnificent Self. You can overcome the losses, the difficulties, the over inflation, the grandiosity, the judgements, the distain and despair. You can become something new by working through your losses and loves, by opening your heart, by emptying out the inner dross and take the risk to live Fully Alive. What’s at risk for you to do so? What’s at risk for you not to do so? Which will you choose?
- Take a few moments to sit with your Inner Being and simply rest here. Breathe in. Breathe out. Relax, release and realign your hidden selves with your True Authentic Creative Self. Notice what comes up for you. What are you noticing? What are the joys, the sorrows? Embrace them all and begin to dialogue with them in your journal today and this week.
- Be still for awhile longer and allow your Self to cradle your many selves. Calm and Center. Recognize the many roads traveled and less traveled which have brought you here, now. Feel the wonder of being in this moment embracing all your parts. Feel the possibilities emerging now that you’re beginning to experience and express who you truly are. Give thanks for the blessing of this moment. What does this moment ask of you? Note the possibilities. What’s at risk for you to say No? What’s at risk for you to say Yes? Make it so . . . . It’s a process . . . .